


GoM Randomness

by orphan_account



Category: Kuroko no Basuke | Kuroko's Basketball
Genre: Attempt at Humor, Crack, No Plot/Plotless, No Romance, No Sex
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-11-15
Updated: 2014-11-15
Packaged: 2018-02-25 12:50:30
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,392
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2622404
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Take a peek into the (not-so) normal lives of the GoM and the people in their lives! A oneshot on the GoM and some others. NO YAOI. Please R&R. Crack. This is our first fanfiction, so please tell us if it's good or not. We accept any requests or questions.</p>
            </blockquote>





	GoM Randomness

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer: We do not own Kuroko no Basket.
> 
> Warning: OOC-ness and crack. Also, this is our first fic, so I apologize if it's crappy.

Another day in the life the GoM…

"Kurokocchi~!" Kise yelled as he glomped (well, attempted to glomp) Kuroko. Kuroko sipped his milkshake as he sidestepped Kise's attack and stared at him blankly as he sailed past Kuroko and into the bushes of the park they were currently in.

"I would greatly appreciate it if you could refrain from trying to hug me every time you see me," he said monotonously. Kise was about to open his mouth, exaggerated tears already streaming down his face, when Midorima stepped in.

"Go away, Kise. You are only bothering Kuroko-nanodayo. I need to discuss something about Kerosuke with him-nanodayo," he said as he stared at Kise haughtily. Kuroko looked at him gratefully (well, it was really only a slight twitch of his lips) as he slowly inched away from Kise so as to avoid being glomped.

"Awww, Shin-chan, you tsundere~," Takao teased as he popped up out of nowhere.

"I am not a tsundere-nanodayo!" Midorima vehemently denied as he pushed up his glasses. Takao merely smirked at him. He turned around and was about to ask Kuroko a question when Aomine suddenly came out of nowhere.

"OI TETSU! WHERE DID YOU HIDE MY GRAVURE MAGAZINES!" Aomine yelled as he put Kuroko in a headlock. Kuroko continued to sip his milkshake as if nothing was wrong, while everyone else sweat-dropped.

"You're not supposed to read those kinds of things, Aomine-kun," he said, neither denying nor agreeing to Aomine's accusation. Aomine shook his head sadly.

"Baka Tetsu. MAI-CHAN IS MY LIFE! You just don't understand," he sighed. Kuroko didn't have a chance to say anything back before Akashi walked in with Murasakibara.

"Tetsuya, don't drink too much milkshakes. They are high in sugar," he reprimanded. Kuroko ignored him and continued to sip his milkshake. Takao sweat-dropped. How much milkshake was there in one cup?It was amazing how long that one milkshake had lasted. Akashi developed an angry tic-mark on his forehead.

"Tetsuya, did you hear me at all?" he drawled out. Kuroko continued to ignore him as Murasakibara eyed his milkshake hungrliy.

"Kuro-chin, can I have your milkshake?" he pleaded. Kuroko stared at him and magically procured a bag full of different-flavored maiubos.

"No, but you can have these," he offered as he held out the bag to Murasakibara. Murasakibara immediately grabbed the bag from Kuroko and began eating all the maiubo.

"NO! TETSUYA'S IN HIS REBELLIOUS STAGE! Midorima Okaa-san, do something about it!" Akashi wailed helplessly as he stared at Midorima imploringly. Midorima stared at him, miffed.

"Why do I have to be the mother?" he asked, offended. He clutched the red pencil he was currently carrying in his pocket (his lucky item of the day).

"Give me some scissors," Akashi demanded as he held his hand out impatiently. "I must teach Tetsuya a lesson."

"Sagittarius's have bad luck today-nanodayo. I do not have the scissors that you need. My lucky item for today is this red pencil," Midorima said as he pushed up his glasses again and held up the pencil with his other hand.

"I am the one who determines fate, not Oha-Asa," Akashi said as he magically procured a pair of scissors. "Aha! I knew I had scissors somewhere!" he said as he snipped them repeatedly. Midorima sweat-dropped and backed away slowly. Why did he ask him for scissors if he had a pair already?

While this had been occurring, Kuroko had wandered off somewhere else when he met Kagami.

"Oi, isn't that Akashi and Midorima over there? Let's go see what's happening," Kagami said, oblivious to what had occured beforehand.

"I think it's better if we stay away, Kagami-kun," Kuroko suggested monotonously. He really didn't want to get killed today when he still had a bright future ahead of him.

"Why? We can't just chicken out here. Besides, I want to challenge Akashi to a one-on-one," Kagami said stubbornly.

"You're going to die before you can challenge him, Kagami-kun. Just look at the scissors that Akashi-kun is currently snipping," Kuroko pointed out. The scissors did indeed look very malicious; their sharp edges gleamed in the sunlight as Akashi snipped them back and forth.

"What are you talking about, Kuroko? I can challe-" Kagami was cut off as the very same scissors that Akashi had been holding flew past his face, one centimeter away. "Oi, Kuroko! What was that just now?" he yelled, paling quickly as he realized how easily he could have been killed. Akashi stalked up to Kuroko and Kagami slowly as he procured another pair of scissors. Takao laughed inwardly. He was really starting to feel like an outsider, but this scene was way too funny, and he didn't want to leave anytime soon. But still-how many scissors does Akashi have?

"Well, well, isn't it Tetsuya. I could have sworn you were near me a few minutes ago, ALONE," Akashi said as he smiled sweetly with a dark aura behind him. Kuroko attempted to use misdirection to escape the wrath of his ex-captain, but, of course, it was impossible, for he was going against the formidable Emperor Eyes. Kagami shifted uncomfortably at his side, then came to a sudden realization.

"Hey! Why did I get ignored when Kuroko has the weaker presence?!" he exclaimed indignantly.

"It's because you're so stupid, Kagami-kun. He didn't feel the need to acknowledge your presence," Kuroko said. Kagami looked at him, offended, while Akashi smiled at him approvingly.

"Tetsuya, you know me so well. I am proud of you. As a reward, take this scissor," Akashi said as he handed over his pair of scissors, completely forgetting why he had taken them out in the first place.

"Thank you, Akashi-kun," Kuroko bowed and then snipped the scissors experimentally. Kagami backed away and sweat-dropped. He really hoped that Kuroko wouldn't start acting like Akashi now...

"I am still here-nanodayo," Midorima said as he pushed up his glasses yet again. He quickly added, "It's not like I was feeling left out or anything-nanodayo." It was at this point that Takao was finally able to rejoin the conversation.

"Tsundere," he commented, coughing loudly so as to hide the fact that he ever said that. Of course, it didn't really hide it all that well.

"Shut up!" Midorima said instinctively. "Wait, Takao? I forgot you were here!" he exclaimed as he realized that it had been Takao who said that (not that anyone else would have said that anyway).

"You forgot I was here? How rude! How could you forget your best friend? you horrible person!" Takao said, feigning his incredulity. Of course, he had already known that Midorima had forgotten about him-in fact, everyone there had probably forgotten about him. Except Akashi. Akashi was just ignoring him because he felt that Takao wasn't worth his time. Of course, Takao didn't know that.

"Shut up! And go away! I need to discuss something with Kuroko and Akashi-nanodayo," Midorima said as he composed himself after the shock of seeing someone else show up out of nowhere, much like Kuroko.

"Outsiders aren't needed," Akashi said menacingly as he snipped his scissors. "NOW LEAVE BEFORE I DYE YOUR SKIN DARK RED. Right, Tetsuya?" he added. He seemed much bigger than before (like he could actually look down on them rather than the other way around), while a dark, threatening aura surrounded him.

"Hahaha! I am Akashi-sama! Bow down to me!" Kuroko said as he snipped the scissors that had been bestowed upon him by the great Akashi-sama. He was facing away from the group, practicing his evil laugh and trying to act like Akashi. He turned around when Akashi said his name and nodded while everyone else (except Akashi) sweat-dropped.

"But why? It's so fun here!" Takao said, seemingly oblivious to the precarious situation he was currently in.

"You dare defy me?!" Akashi and Kuroko said as they snipped their scissors in sync. Takao sweat-dropped (there seems to be a lot of sweat-dropping) as he slowly backed away and decided it was probably best to heed Midorima's advice.

"I'll just...leave now..." he said as he walked, raising his arms in a placating gesture. At this point, Kagami rejoined the conversation after feeling left out.

"Kuroko, I'm starting to get really scared..." he said as he watched the events unfold before him. Unfortunately, Kuroko's milkshake had run out (finally), and he had managed to go to Maji Burger in the time it took for Takao to leave.

"Kuroko?!" Kagami exclaimed disbelievingly. How the heck did he get to Maji Burger so quickly?

"Now, Bakagami," Akashi smiled as he turned away from Takao's retreating form. The smile dropped from his face suddenly as he adopted a menacing look. "IT'S YOUR TURN TO LEAVE."

"NO! NOT THE SCISSORS! ANYTHING BUT THE SCISSORS!" Kagami yelled as he ran away screaming. (Later, onlookers would claim to see a tall, dark-red haired teenager running away and screaming like a little girl.)

*Meanwhile, at Maji Burger…*

Kise had followed Kuroko to Maji Burger, as everyone else had forgotten about him and Aomine, so there was really no need to be there anymore.

"KUROKOCCHI~" Kise (attempted to) glomp Kuroko again after Kuroko had finished buying his milkshake. Kuroko gracefully sidestepped him and continued to sip his milkshake as if nothing had happened, completely ignoring Kise. Exaggerated tears were running from Kise's face as he stood up from where he had landed on the floor.

"Kurokocchi! You're so mean!" he cried as he clung to Kuroko, trying to get him to acknowledge his presence.

"Please stop talking, Kise-kun. Your voice is annoying," he said with a slight tinge of annoyance.

"Kurokocchi is as blunt as ever! I'm kind of glad your personality didn't change even when we changed schools, though. But Kurokocchi, what's with that attitude! Seriously! I wanted to talk to you about something important! Kurokocchi! Please say something!" Kise ranted as Kuroko grew increasingly annoyed.

"Go away, Kise-kun," he finally said as he dislodged Kise and walked out of Maji Burger, Kise trailing after him like a lost puppy.

"Kurokocchi is so mean! I think Kurokocchi got influenced by Akashicchi too much!" he cried harder as he imagined Kuroko with Akashi's personality. It was a horrible image.

*Back to the others*

"OII, KUROKO! WE'RE LEA-wait, where did he go?" Kagami said as he realized that Kuroko was no longer at Maji Burger. Midorima had left with him, because he didn't want to be on the receiving side of Akashi's wrath.

"Looks like you were abandoned-nanodayo. How pathetic," he commented as he pushed up his glasses for the fourth time. When he realized that he had also been abandoned by Takao (although Takao had left to save himself from Akashi's terror, which was a completely different story), he said, "Oi, Takao! Where are you? It's not like I was feeling lonely or anything-nanodayo." Takao popped out of nowhere. (Seriously, it's like he has a Midorima radar or something.)

"Hahaha you tsundere!" he laughed at Midorima. Midorima's cheeks tinted red.

"Shut up!" he said in an effort to regain his dignity.

"Awww, you're blushing!" Takao said teasingly.

"Hmph. Go and buy me a red bean drink," Midorima said, still trying to gather up the shattered fragments of his manly pride. Takao laughed.

"Hai, hai," he smiled. "Tsundere," he added, his voice dropping to a whisper. Midorima's glasses flashed.

"What was that?!" he said as he pushed up his glasses for the umpteenth time.

"Hahaha! Nothing! I said nothing at all!" Takao said as he ran off to get the red bean drink.

"It had better be nothing," Midorima muttered darkly. "I'm all alone now," Midorima said as he realized that Kagami had gone off (probably to look for Kuroko) again, leaving him standing alone outside of Maji Burger.

"Oi, Midorima! Help up find Kuroko!" Kagami yelled as he returned with Kise (who had lost Kuroko somewhere). They had been hoping that he had returned to Maji Burger for another milkshake, but it seemed that was not the case.

"Hmph. You can just text him, can't you?" Midorima said as became his arrogant self again. He really hoped that they hadn't heard that comment before.

"You were feeling lonely, Midorima-kun?" Kuroko said as he showed up out of nowhere. Midorima flinched, then tried to act as if he hadn't.

"WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE, KUROKO?! How long have you been here?" he asked, trying to change the topic. Kagami and Kise stared at him confusedly as they saw him jump and yell at seemingly nothing.

"I was just coming back for another milkshake and I heard you say something about being alone again, so I decided to walk over to you. I just got here," Kuroko said as he held up his (now empty) milkshake. Kagami and Kise began worrying for Midorima's sanity as they saw him talk to empty air, which seemed to be slowly taking shape...

"Hmph. You were probably just hearing things," Midorima said as he looked away from Kuroko, completely forgetting about the two who were a few meters away from them. By that time, Kagami and Kise had realized that Midorima had not, in fact, been conversing with thin air, and had instead been talking to the ever-elusive ex-phantom sixth player of Teiko.

"AH! KUROKO!" Kagami yelled as they both began running to Kuroko, hoping to catch him before he could pull another disappearing act. Kuroko looked at them abd then turned to Midorima.

"I will be taking my leave now, Midorima-kun," he said politely as he turned to go away.

"It's not like I will be lonely-nanodayo," he said as he pushed up his glasses again. (God, how many times is he going to push up his glasses?) Kuroko stopped and turned around to look at Midorima.

"Don't worry, Takao-san will be back soon with your red bean drink, and Kagami-kun is running over—" he got interrupted by Kise yelling, "KUROKOCCHI! WHY DID YOU LEAVE ME?!", but he continued on as if nothing was wrong, "—and so is Kise-kun. Good bye, Midorima-kun."

"I said I won't be lonely-nanodayo!" he exclaimed as he looked around to see if anyone had heard him to find that Kuroko was gone.

"Shin-chan~ I'm back! Here's your red bean drink!" Takao yelled, running to Midorima and waving the can, before Midorima could fully process that yes, Kuroko was already gone and it had only been a few seconds.

"Hmph. Took you long enough," Midorima said arrogantly after he had given looking to see if Kuroko was anywhere near them.

"Awwww, were you feeling lonely, you tsundere?" Takao smirked as he saw Midorima look around—presumably for company.

"Of course not-nanodayo," Midorima replied.

"Suuuure~" Takao drawled out, just to annoy him. Kagami and Kise had realized that Kuroko had left and had decided to go inside Maji Burger for a short break. They had been running all over the city looking for Kuroko, in vain.

"I had company-nanodayo. You were taking too long, so I had someone accompany while I was waiting for my incompetent servant," Midorima said, insulting Takao, who, fo course, didn't take offense.

"Awwww, so you were lonely!" Takao laughed as he only heard the "had someone accompany me" part of Midorima's sentence.

"No I was not!" Midorima huffed as he pushed up glasses for the who-knows-what time. "I have Kerosuke with me! Who needs you?!" he added as he clutched his Kerosuke statue along with the pencil—the very sharp pencil, mind you—in an effort to refrain from stabbing Takao.

"Tsundere~" Takao stuck his tongue out at Midorima.

"Stop calling me a tsundere!" Midorima exclaimed. He was considering charging Takao 1000 yen every time he said "tsundere".

"Keep thinking that," Takao laughed. At this point, Kagami and Kise had decided to resume the shadow-hunt.

"OI MIDORIMA! HAVE YOU SEEN KUROKO?!" Kagami yelled as he hoped that Kuroko had passed by their area again.

"Haha! There're more people now! You're not alone anymore!" Takao teased as he looked over to Kagami and Kise.

"What are you thinkning?" Midorima hissed as a vein popped on his forehead. "And no, I have not seen Kuroko," he added, answering Kagami's question.

"Stop being such a tsundere!" Takao said. Midorima began to think that it would be a really good idea to charge Takao every time he said "tsundere". He probably said it enough so far to make Midorima a millionare. And it was only the middle of the day!

"Are you sure?" Kagami asked suspiciously, sure he had seen Midorima talking to Kuroko fifteen minutes ago.

"WHERE IS KUROKOCCHI!?" Kise yelled as he looked to Takao. Midorima nervously pushed his glasses up ten times while he shook from the pressure. By this time, Takao began to think about charging Midorima for every time he pushed up his glasses.

"He went that way!" Takao said as he pointed in the general direction of where Kuroko had disappeared off to.

"How did you know?!" Midorima asked incredulously. He had been sure that the only one to see Kuroko had been him. At this point, Kagami and Kise had run off in the direction that Takao had pointed in. What Midorima said had only enforced what Takao had said, so they decided to start their search again by going to a place that Kuroko would most likely visit in that general directoin.

"Don't underestimate my Hawk-Eyes," Takao said seriously. Midorima fidgeted slightly while he pushed up his glasses repeatedly.

"I also heard the whole conversation between you guys~" Takao said, reverting back into his teasing self.

"WHAT?! You heard me tell Kuroko about being lonely?! BECAUSE IT'S NOT LIKE THAT! That was just a lie-nanodayo." Midorima yelled in an effort to save himself from hearing Takao call him a tsundere yet again. He pushed up his glasses once he finished ranting.

"Haha! You just told me what you guys were talking about! What I said before what a complete lie! You tsundere~" Takao proudly stated. Midorima felt that he would never be free from hearing "tsundere" ever again.

"What?!" Midorima exclaimed disbelievingly. He really should start charging Takao. Myabe he would start tomorrow.

"You heard me! You just revealed how lonely you were!" Takao rephrased his previous statements. Then he noticed that Kagami and Kise had left. "Hey! Kagami and Kise are gone!" he said.

"Hmph. What are they thinking?" Midorima said as he contemplated the fate of the world with these idiots as the new generation of leaders. It would not be a bright future.

"Don't worry, I'm still here~" Takao (fake) comforted Midorima.

"Go away," Midorima humphed.

"Are you sure? Aren't you going to be lonely?" Takao asked with false concern.

"Hmph. You are unpleasant company. I don't need you. No one needs you," Midorima said bitingly.

"So you want me to leave?" Takao asked with (false) hurt. (This guy just reeks of phoniness).

"If you need me to say it again, I will. I do not need you, Takao. Go away," Midorima turned away and sipped on his red bean drink when he realized that he had been holding it the whole time.

"Fine~ I'll just leave and you'll be all lonely again," Takao (fake) pouted.

"Hmph, fine by me. I won't be lonely at all-nanodayo," Midorima said as he finished off his drink.

"Oh, really~" Takao smirked and left.

"Hmph, that Takao is the lonely one," Midorima sniffed as he threw away the can. He was about to leave, when Akashi approached him.

"Shintarou~ Have you seen Tetsuya?" Akashi asked. After he realized he still hadn't punished Kuroko for defying him, he had gone on a manhunt for him, much like Kagami and Kise.

"Umm…yes sir! He was h-here a w-while ago and l-left that way!" Midorima said as he nervously pushed up his glasses.

"Thank you, Shintarou~" Akashi said as he turned around to leave, a creepy aura surrounding him as he planned all the different ways he could punish Kuroko for defying him and running away (it was not his fault that Kuroko was able to get away unscathed. He is absolute. He cannot do anything wrong). Midorima watched as Akashi stalked off, looking a lot like a predator stalking its prey.

"I'll just leave now..." he said as he left Maji Burger and went home to sleep and (hopefully) forget all that happened that day.


End file.
